I said it last week that life has been hard. So hard! But I can now say that it is starting to get better. Slowly, but surely. I felt like things were going smoothly and then I hit a bump in the road- a giant, mountain of a bump. It hit me like a ton of bricks. Then came the dark cloud. Things felt heavy, like I was moving through molasses. I went to work and went through the motions. Then I came home and went to sleep, not because I was tired but because I didn't want to be awake anymore. Last weekend, I think I slept for 22 hours. Sheesh!
But slowly things have started to get better. I have clung to the Lord and spent time in prayer. I have realized my own humility and weakness. I have discovered, once again, that I can do nothing on my own strength. I have forced myself to get out of the house and spend time with friends. I have relied on others instead of going down a rabbit trail of thoughts within my own head. And then I went to therapy last week and got to process it all with her.
I know that doesn't automatically fix everything. I know there will still be times when things are hard and when situations and issues come back to haunt me, but for now things are looking up and I do feel as if I am in a better place than I have been. I am still excited to celebrate the small victories and to store up stones of remembrance. (And to get a permanent reminder soon!)
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