Accidental Therapist

Somehow I have turned in to an impromptu therapist. And it's kind of freaking me out!

It started off innocently enough. One of the girls from work would talk to me about her crushes or dates she had been on when she would see me on the floor. It then progressed to random texts. No big deal. Dating and crushes- I can handle. I may be a total train wreck when it comes to myself, but I am generally better at giving advice to others. But then she kind of started dating this guy and I know better than anyone that flirting is all fun and games, but dating brings up all sorts of previously repressed shit!

What started as talking about frivolous escapades quickly escalated to insecurities and past hurts. And wow! I felt privileged to be let in, but also like I was responsible for something fragile and had to treat it that way. I felt inadequate and as if I didn't have the words that would make things better and take away hurt. Therapy is a big responsibility, y'all! One night after a particular text, I had no idea what to say. I literally had no words. I was afraid to say the wrong thing and make things worse, or say something flippant and appear calloused. So I got in the shower. It's where I do my best thinking, after all! And I prayed- for guidance, for the right words to say, for the way they were received. Then I got out and texted her back. I don't know if anything I said was helpful or resonated with her at all, but I hope it did.

It made me start thinking. I always say that God wants us in a place of total dependence on Him and that He will do whatever it takes to get us there. Most of the time, for me, this involves tears, kicking, and screaming. But I think this was another subtle way to get my attention and bring my focus back to Him.

Guys, I can do nothing without Him! He continues to remind me to return to Him. To come to Him for strength, and peace, and rest. To return to Him to provide daily bread- the nourishment that only He can!